I recently worked with a young friend who just opened her first acupuncture clinic with another young woman. When they were setting up their business bank account, and the personal banker found out that yes, in fact, acupuncture was useful for headaches, she became a good referral source for them.
Now she has invited Joan to a bank-sponsored golf outing for small businesses. Joan is feeling terrified! For one thing, she is not a golfer. And, she hates going to a group of people where she knows no one. Plus, her mind is throwing up all the self doubts she has ever collected about self-worth and inadequacy.
She said, "When I was in acupuncture school I felt competent and I did a good job (except when I froze on exams!). Now, with my business, I have a hard time putting myself out there. I have trouble initiating conversations about what I do. I find myself assuming that people aren’t interested in listening to me. I feel like they are just humoring me when I talk.
I feel so inexperienced, and it brings up all my feelings of not being as good as other people. My mind disconnects from my mouth and I begin to feel like I am talking gibberish. And then I start thinking, how can I feel justified in even asking for money for what I do? It is one thing to work with family and friends for free, but I fall into doubting that my services are worth what I am charging.
Help! How can I truly believe in the value of what I have to offer? And I don’t even know how to play golf!!"
I am sure that at least one or two of you reading this have had similar feelings…